LUX Menu

Tap Water

$15

Clean, safe water that is suitable for drinking.

Bottled Water

$25

Drinking water sealed in a glass container for human consumption.

Iced Water with Lemon

$25

It delivers a crisp, effervescent mouthfeel and a slightly acidic tingling bite.

Sparkling Water

$30

A refreshing, calorie-free, carbon dioxide-infused beverage.

The Original Sin

$30

Dark, sweet, and universally irresistible Cola. Like the Devil Himself.

Angel’s Whisper

$30

Bright lemon-lime refreshment, light enough for Heaven, enjoyable enough for Hell.

Eden’s Harvest

$35

Fresh, cloudy apple juice inspired by the fruit that started humanity's most interesting story.

Sunlight in a Glass

$35

Sweet, tart, carbonated, and impossible to dislike. A rare example of celestial perfection.

Golden Halo

$35

Vibrant orange juice bursting with sunshine and optimism. Neither of which I personally claim responsibility for.

Ruby Redemption

$40

Deep crimson cranberry juice, balancing sweetness and sharpness in equal measure. Much like the guests of LUX.

House Brew

$30

Freshly brewed coffee. The substance responsible for more miracles than religion. Served with milk, sugar, and a Pentecookie™

Morning Ritual

$30

Freshly brewed Breakfast Tea served exactly as one would expect. Reliable, dependable, and remarkably British. Served with milk, sugar, and a Pentecookie™

The Detective

$35

Strong, straightforward coffee with no unnecessary embellishments. Refreshingly honest. Served with sugar, honey, and a Pentecookie™

The Devil’s Shot

$35

Small Powerful. Unforgettable. A coffee much like certain fallen angels. Served with sugar and a Pentecookie™

Morning Meadow

$35

Fresh, green tea with gentle grassy notes and a naturally clean finish. Served with sugar, honey, and a Pentecookie™

The Library Collection

$45

An assortment of teas. Choose wisely; it says more about you than you think. Served with a Pentecookie™

Silver Wings

$45

Espresso beneath a cloud of milk foam, with a light dusting of chocolate. Angels do occasionally get something right. Served with milk, sugar, and a Pentecookie™

Morningstar Velvet

$45

Espresso blended with milk. Smooth, rich, and effortlessly charming. The coffee isn’t bad either. Served with sugar and a Pentecookie™

Frozen Temptation

$50

Cold coffee for those who refuse to let temperature dictate pleasure. Perfect for questionable decisions. Served with sugar and a Pentecookie™

Liquid Indulgence

$60

Chocolate elevated into an art form. Rich Belgian chocolate, steamed milk, whipped cream and decadent toppings. Served with milk, sugar, and a Pentecookie™

The Red Throne

$90

A crimson masterpiece fit for royalty, sinners, and everyone in between. Elegance served in a cup. Served with a Pentecookie™

The Honest Pint

$45

Fresh draft beer. No pretence. No ceremony. Just good beer and better company. Served with the Devil’s Nuts.

Cold Comfort

$50

A child, bottled beer. Proof that happiness occasionally comes with a bottle cap. Served with the Devil’s Nuts.

Eden’s Revenge

$50

Crisp apple cider inspired by the fruit that changed everything. One caused enough trouble; why not ferment a few more?

The Silver River

$60

Premium gin served with smoked salmon bites. Elegant, refreshing, and deceptively smooth.

Stairway to Heaven

$60

Coconut Rum served with tropical flair. Paradise may be closer than you think.

Captain’s Fortune

$60

Four shots of rum, a bottle, and a chest full of ice. What could possibly go wrong?

The Devil’s Blood

$60

Deep crimson cherry vodka.Rich, sweet, and dangerously easy to enjoy.

Heaven’s Realm

$65

Crisp and elegant white wine selected for those seeking refinement.

Jammy Devil

$65

Rich, fruity red wine with enough character to start trouble.

Whispering Angel

$70

Delicate rosé offering notes of summer fruit and quiet indulgence.

Fallen Angels

$70

Six Tequila shots served with black salt and fresh lime. The descent begins here.

The Devil’s Tale

$75

A whisky with depth, warmth, and a story worth hearing.

Kiss of Immortality

$90

Elegant bubbles and timeless celebration in every glass of wine.

Coconut Sinner

$85

Coconut rum and cola served over ice. A taste of Heaven with just enough rebellion to make it interesting.

Bandit’s Paradise

$85

A tropical blend of pineapple and coconut. Sweet enough to distract you while the raccoon steals your wallet.

Pirate’s Pleasure

$85

A timeless partnership between dark rum and cola. Reliable, familiar, and surprisingly dangerous.

Bleeding Sun

$85

Crisp vodka paired with refreshing lemonade. Light, bright, and effortlessly enjoyable. Dangerously refreshing and far too easy to justify ordering another.

Soldier’s Remedy

$90

A classic gin and tonic served with elegance and restraint. Historically medicinal, we recommend continuing the treatment.

Midnight Sinner

$95

Smooth whisky softened by cola. Every good story starts with one.

Sunrise to Sunset

$110

Tequila, orange juice, and grenadine, creating a sunrise worthy of a second chance.

Peppermint Pride

$110

Fresh mint, lime, rum, and temptation. A refreshing tribute to the world’s modern issues of acceptance.

Burning Halo

$120

Tequila, lime, and orange liqueur served with a salted rim. Heavenly with a mischievous edge.

Mellow Coffee

$130

Coffee and vodka, united in a drink that refuses to let the night end. For guests who wish to continue making regrettable decisions until dawn.

First Sin

$140

Whisky, bitters, and sugar. Timeless, sophisticated, and impossible to improve upon. Simple ingredients, but serious intentions.

Shaken, Not Stirred

$140

Shaken, not stirred. A sophisticated classic fit for spies, secret agents, and other professional liars. We do try to maintain standards.

Heaven & Hell

$150

Inspired by the classic B-52, Heaven & Hell layers coffee liqueur, Irish cream, and orange liqueur into a striking contrast of dark and light. Caught between divine ambition and poor decision-making. We've paired it with Devil's Nuts because temptation is always easier with snacks.

Step Into the Light

$150

Based on a White Russian that briefly considered becoming respectable, this luxurious cocktail combines vodka, coffee liqueur, and cream into a smooth experience. Served with dark chocolate and salted caramels for those ready to embrace enlightenment.

Piano Noir

$160

An Espresso Martini composed like a midnight sonata, blending vodka, coffee liqueur, and freshly brewed espresso into a sophisticated cocktail. Accompanied by tiramisu, because every masterpiece deserves an encore.

Red Temptation

$160

A Woo Woo dressed for a far more interesting evening, this vibrant cocktail combines vodka, peach schnapps, and cranberry juice into a sweet and seductive creation. Served alongside cured meats and red fruits, even Eve would have approved.

Devil’s Velvet

$175

An Old Fashioned refined over centuries of excellent taste. It features carefully selected whisky, bitters, and a touch of sweetness. The bacon-wrapped dates and pretzels are there to remind you that elegance and indulgence aren't mutually exclusive.

Hellfire Highball

$175

A Bloody Mary that appears to have witnessed a crime. Rich tomato flavours, spices, and premium spirits are combined with dramatic elements resembling a crime scene. Complete with wings and bacon because if you're embracing chaos, do commit properly.

Silver Tongue

$175

A Lotus Martini with enough charm to talk its way out of almost anything. It delivers delicate floral sweetness balanced by crisp spirits and elegant presentation. Served with prosciutto and crackers on a thunderous plate worthy of applause.

Be Human

$190

A Blue Lagoon inspired by humanity's remarkable ability to enjoy the simple things. It combines citrus flavours and vivid blue tones into a bright, uplifting cocktail. Pineapple, cream, and blue raspberry cake included, because being mortal should have its perks.

Kiss of Immortality

$190

A Black Forest-inspired cocktail paired with an authentic Black Forest Gateau and fresh cherries. This decadent cocktail blends rich chocolate, cherry, and cream flavours into an indulgent experience. Not quite eternal life, but considerably more enjoyable.

Black Halo

$200

A Chocolate Martini that proves darkness can be utterly delightful. It embraces pure decadence through layers of chocolate liqueur, cream, and premium spirits. Accompanied by truffles, chocolate-covered strawberries, and sea salt crisps for balance. Apparently, that's important.

The Morningstar

$200

A Whisky Sour dressed in black and white, much like its namesake. The Morningstar presents a dramatic contrast of black and white elements, symbolising the duality of light and darkness. Served with wings, bacon, and cheese, because redemption is overrated, but good food isn't.

Golden Sin

$225

A Long Island Iced Tea that ignores moderation entirely. Golden Sin combines multiple premium spirits into a deceptively smooth cocktail that delivers both complexity and strength. Accompanied by nachos, crab cakes, and jalapeños, because excess is an art form.

Aeterna

$250

A Mimosa elevated to LUX standards. Aeterna elevates the brunch classic into a celebration of elegance and refinement. Sparkling wine and citrus are combined into a bright, refreshing cocktail, served with cheeses and fruit skewers for guests who prefer their indulgence wrapped in sophistication.

Lilith's Alimony

$250

Named after my first wife. The bottle is considerably less expensive than the original. Served with grapes, apple, lemon and pretzels because apparently one cannot survive on champagne alone.

The Membership Fee

$300

An eight-year Scotch accompanied by sausage rolls, mini quiches and nuts. A reminder that exclusivity is largely a matter of paperwork.

The Devil’s Due

$350

Distilled four times, matured eighteen years. 85% alcohol served on a scale of justice. The symbolism seemed amusing at the time. The honey and pastries are there to soften the verdict.

Crown of Light

$400

Rose-gold prosecco adorned with precious metals and delicate pastries. One of Heaven's better efforts, admittedly.

The Fallen Angel

$450

Blue raspberry vodka with enough spice on the side to explain the name. As it turns out, falling is easier than climbing.

The Gold Card

$500

Twenty-five years in a barrel and still less aged than some of my regulars. Served with salmon, dried fruits and nuts because luxury enjoys grazing.

Morningstar Reserve

$500

Distilled in 1787 and aged for two centuries. Some things are worth waiting for. Humanity, for example, continues to be debatable.

Purple Reign

$750

Champagne housed in an amethyst bottle because ordinary glass felt somewhat uninspired. Accompanied by oysters, caviar and a few snacks for those pretending not to be hungry.

The Scottish Apology

$850

An exceptional whisky served alongside Scottish shortbread, cheese, chocolate and honey-roasted nuts. Scotland's way of saying "sorry" for inventing whisky strong enough to cause problems.

The Golden Calf

$1000

An absurdly expensive champagne surrounded by edible gold and enough luxury food to make a Roman emperor uncomfortable. Humanity has always enjoyed worshipping shiny objects.

Angel’s Secret

$65

A sparkling peach mocktail served with dried peaches, apples and pineapple. Why it's a secret remains unclear. Angels aren't particularly good at keeping them.

Sinner

$65

A cinnamon coconut cold brew accompanied by a hot black coffee. For guests who want to make questionable decisions while remaining technically sober.

The Devil Himself

$75

A sparkling blueberry and ginger mocktail served with fresh fruit. Vibrant, charming and entirely alcohol-free. Much like my public image.

Pure Hell

$80

A pomegranate spritzer served with a shot of hot sauce. A surprisingly accurate representation of how most mortals handle adversity.

Pure Heaven

$90

A blackberry lemon fizz accompanied by delicate pastries. Light, refreshing, and almost suspiciously pleasant.

Angel’s Kiss

$100

An Appletini-inspired mocktail served with a miniature apple pie. Sweet, innocent, and somehow responsible for more trouble than expected.

CruciCrisps

$15

A bag of premium potato crisps. Simple, reliable, and considerably less fragile than most of my clientele.

Snikkel Bar

$20

Chocolate, caramel and nougat pressed into a convenient bar. Proof that humanity will forgive almost anything if you add enough sugar.

Twerks Candy

$20

A sweet candy bar for those who enjoy poor judgement in bite-sized portions. Fortunately, this one only affects your teeth.

Devil's Nuts

$25

A bowl of mixed roasted nuts. The name amuses me far more than it should.

Purgatory Pretzels

$30

Salted pretzel rings with a satisfying crunch. Remarkably similar to several ancient symbols of eternal torment, only tastier.

Cheesy Corvette

$40

A selection of cheese served with crisp crackers. A timeless arrangement where neither side believes they're getting a fair deal.

Beelzebub Bowl

$45

A bowl of green and black olives. Acquired a taste, much like honesty, responsibility, and certain family members.

Satan's Star

$55

Crisp tortilla nachos layered with melted cheese and salsa. Shaped like a star. Entirely unrelated to any summoning rituals. Probably.

Simple Sins

$25

Golden toasted bread served with butter. Proof that even the simplest pleasures can be utterly divine.

Golden Roll

$35

Creamy scrambled eggs served in a soft brioche roll. Comforting enough to make you question why life is usually more complicated than this.

Blazing Oink Oink

$40

Thick-cut crispy bacon piled generously into a fresh brioche roll. Simple, honest, and far more reliable than most relationships.

Best of Both Worlds

$45

Fluffy egg, melted cheese, and crispy bacon served in a toasted breakfast bun. Designed specifically for people who've made poor decisions and survived them.

Helltaker Pancakes

$55

Stacked fluffy pancakes drizzled with maple syrup and served with sweet butter. The sort of temptation even I approve of before noon.

The Golden Standard

$65

Crisp golden waffles drenched in maple syrup and topped with sweet butter. Conveniently arranged to catch every delicious mistake.

Good and Evil

$120

Eggs, bacon, sausages, hash browns, baked beans, black pudding, grilled tomatoes, mushrooms and toast. Everything required to confess your sins and immediately commit new ones.

Saints & Sinners Brunch

$175

An extravagant breakfast platter featuring smoked salmon, scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage, mushrooms, grilled tomatoes, toast, a buttery croissant and freshly brewed coffee. For those who believe moderation is merely a suggestion.

Sad Desk Lunch

$25

A classic sandwich with ham, cheese, lettuce and tomato on fresh bread. Unremarkable by heavenly standards, yet humanity seems endlessly fascinated by it.

Seraphim Melt

$35

A toasted sandwich filled with ham, cheese, lettuce and tomato. Sometimes a little heat is exactly what improves one's character.

Pit Boss

$45

Tender chicken breast, fresh salad and creamy dressing served in soft bread. A surprisingly successful use of a creature that once believed it could fly.

Archangel BLT

$45

Bacon, lettuce, and tomato layered together in perfect balance.

Hell’s Broth

$45

A freshly prepared vegetable soup served hot with seasonal ingredients. Fortunately, considerably less threatening than the version downstairs.

The Wilted Abyss

$50

A fresh salad of mixed greens, walnuts, bacon, blue cheese and sweet pear. Ordered mostly by people wishing to feel responsible before dessert.

Sorrow in a Blanket

$55

Grilled chicken, crisp lettuce and creamy dressing wrapped in a soft tortilla. Conveniently portable for those avoiding awkward conversations.

The Holy Trinity

$70

A freshly made sandwich served with crisps and a drink. For those who insist on being productive during daylight hours.

The Catacombs

$90

A juicy beef burger topped with cheese, bacon and caramelised onions, served alongside fries. Humanity's finest argument against moderation.

The Priest’s Feast

$100

A triple-layer sandwich stacked with chicken, bacon, lettuce, tomato and mayonnaise. The sort of lunch one orders when pretending to have important meetings.

Angel’s Hair

$85

A hearty bowl of pasta tossed in a rich house sauce and finished with parmesan. Proof that the simplest pleasures are often the most dangerous.

Devilish Diablo

$100

Tender grilled chicken served atop seasoned rice. Simple, reliable, and refreshingly free of unnecessary drama. Unlike most people.

The Codfather

$110

Golden battered fish served with thick-cut chips and tartar sauce. A timeless British classic, though I suspect the fish had other plans.

Lilith’s Labia

$130

Slices of tender steak served in toasted bread with fresh salad and sauce. An offer so appealing you'd sign before reading the terms.

Devilish & Divine

$150

Grilled chicken breast served with vegetables and your choice of sides. Healthy enough to impress an angel, enjoyable enough to tempt a devil.

Lucifer’s Buns

$150

A signature beef burger stacked with cheese, bacon, fresh salad and house sauce. Bold, indulgent and impossible to ignore. Rather familiar, really.

The Red Room Affair

$175

A rich, indulgent pasta tossed in a luxurious red sauce with carefully selected herbs and spices. Sophisticated, seductive and best enjoyed without asking too many questions.

The Holy Smoked

$220

Perfectly cooked salmon served with seasonal vegetables and accompanying sides. Elegant, refined and surprisingly difficult to keep out of temptation's reach.

Damned Deviled Ribeye

$250

A premium steak cooked to your liking, served with vegetables and carefully selected sides. The sort of meal that makes wealth seem almost worthwhile.

The Golden Gates

$350

LUX's premium chef-selected signature meal, crafted from the finest ingredients available. For those rare occasions when excess is simply the correct decision.

Dark & Divine

$25

A freshly baked cookie with a golden exterior and soft centre. Humanity has traded far more valuable things for considerably less.

The Devil's Butthole

$25

A perfectly glazed ring doughnut with a soft, fluffy centre and a suspiciously inviting hole. Immature? Perhaps. Delicious? Undeniably.

The Devil’s Horns

$30

A buttery, flaky croissant baked until perfectly golden. Delicate, indulgent and entirely worth disappointing someone over.

Devil's Sweet Tooth

$30

A decadent cupcake topped with rich buttercream frosting and finished with devilish flair. For those moments when self-control simply isn't on the menu.

The Unholy Trinity

$30

A soft, freshly baked muffin bursting with flavour. Small enough to seem innocent, which is usually how trouble begins.

Dark Intentions

$35

A rich chocolate brownie with a dense, fudgy centre. Decadent enough to make virtue feel rather overrated.

Lucifer’s Forbidden Cream

$60

A smooth, creamy cheesecake on a buttery biscuit base. Silky, indulgent and impossible to stop at just one bite.

The Homicidal Queen

$60

A moist chocolate cake layered with rich chocolate frosting. Proof that darkness has always had superior marketing.

The Red Velvet Sin

$75

A luxurious red velvet cake layered with smooth cream cheese frosting. Elegant on the surface, dangerously indulgent underneath.

Espresso with Sins

$90

Layers of coffee-soaked sponge, mascarpone cream and cocoa. Sophisticated, seductive and remarkably effective at making people forget their plans.

Heavenly Berries

$150

A rich chocolate tart with a silky ganache filling and delicate pastry shell. Every deal has a price. This one happens to be delicious.

The Pearly Gate

$200

A luxurious selection of premium desserts chosen by our chefs and presented for sharing. Or not. I certainly wouldn't.

Dips & Deathtraps

$50

A generous bowl of premium crisps served for sharing. Or, more realistically, quietly guarding from everyone else at the table.

Nightmare Nacho’s

$150

A mountain of nachos loaded with cheese, salsa, sour cream and toppings. Designed specifically for people who gave up pretending they weren't hungry.

Sins by the Slice

$180

A selection of freshly prepared pizza slices featuring a variety of toppings. Convenient for sharing, though rarely shared equally.

Devils Chip Challenge

$200

An outrageously spicy chip challenge intended for those with courage, confidence or very poor judgement. Sometimes all three.

Burgatory

$200

A selection of miniature beef burger sliders packed with flavour. Proof that temptation doesn't need to be large to be effective.

Wings of the Damned

$220

A generous platter of chicken wings served with your choice of sauces. The closest most mortals will come to tasting fallen angels.

Brie in Paradise

$250

A carefully curated board of premium cheeses, crackers and accompaniments. Sophisticated, refined and slightly judgemental.

Sweet Salvation

$250

A sharing platter featuring an assortment of cakes, pastries and sweet treats. Every vice deserves representation.

The Devil’s Deal

$300

A luxurious selection of premium snacks prepared for VIP guests and private parties. Ideal for making important decisions, or terrible ones.

Greed & Gluttony

$500

A lavish assortment of premium meats, cheeses, fruits, pastries and gourmet bites designed for groups. The embodiment of glorious excess.

God’s Given

$750

LUX's ultimate sharing experience. An extravagant display of premium foods, luxury snacks and chef-selected favourites presented for the most distinguished guests. Because royalty should never have to choose.